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I hope I'm wrong and if you're the one that wrote the Fred Myer cutie post and have no idea what I'm talking about in this post, move along. But, R. I think you posted something here. I can't be sure. But I usually check the missed connections for a good laugh and for no reason at all. I clicked on the Fred Myer cutie posting last night, I wish I hadn't. And they way it was written...was written how you used to write to me. And it sounds like you were shopping with our best friend that we share. If it's you, we only left one another a week ago. I guess you're doing fine if you're trying to get at a Fred Myer cashier. I told you I was fine and not sad. I am sad, I'm definitely not over you within a week. I guess you've been over me for a while though. I told you I was okay and I'm not. Is that what you want to hear from me? I can't sleep, you've ruined the Cranberries and you've ruined sunflowers, you've ruined the season of summer and the color yellow. Is that what you want to hear from me? You broke me. You broke my heart and you said you never would. "I swore I would be true, and honey, so did you." You're cutting me out for good, I can tell. You blocked me from your Instagram and I thought we said we were going to try to be friends? I guess it's not a good idea, because clearly. I'm in love with you still. I'm trying not be. I'm trying my best to hate you and accept that what we had ran it's course and that you obviously don't care about me anymore. Even then, I still cannot muster any anger or lament towards you. If it's you who made that posting...I hope you see this one and know that I don't want you anymore either. I'm trying to not need you any longer. But like I said, I'm having you uproot the home you made for yourself in my chest. I'm blocking out the 7 or 8 months we had like they're some kind of traumatic event. But you're everywhere. I still see the world with a layer of your eye color glossed over mine. I still feel and see you in everything. But I have to remind myself, you gave up and stopped caring about me when I thought we were still in love. I hate that I've become like the other pathetic, lonesome desperados making Craigslist posting on this forum. But I had to see if you're the one who wrote that posting. And you won't reach out to me anymore, it's okay. I know things got too hard for us and you let go. So I'm trying to let go too. But if you ever want back into my life all you have to do is ask. I'm sad and broken and sick inside, but still can't get you out of my head. You see what you've done to me? You don't have to let me know if you're the one trolling around for a Fred Myer cashier, it's probably best if I never know. You said you're moving away soon, I am too. And you'll never see me again, and what hurts the most is that I know you'll be okay and you'll forget about me completely. Please take care of yourself, I still worry about you, you're my one and only.
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